The ads fall into 3 main categories :
- Musicals (incase the working week isn't painful enough)
- Informative poems by TFL (incase the working week isn't painful enough)
- The Latest Celebrity Autobiography
It's the last that has become a little surreal, with a definite pattern in how these ads look. Obviously their name; the title is typically 'Autobiography', 'My Autobiography' if they are proper friendly like, or a pun relating to their career; and their portrait. In these shots 90% look like they're touching cloth, desperately concentrating with all their might not to pinch - the remaining 10% have a self assured post-pinch-but-cool-with-it grin.
These may well be amazing people with tonnes of interesting things to say, Gandhi and Churchill had a autobiographies after all. Honestly though, if any of these people below, looking as they do on their covers, approached you in the street and asked to chat - would you :
a) stop and listen for an hour a day for the next week and a half
b) avoid eye contact and dial up the pace
c) suspect a stroke and call 999. The faster you act, the more of the person you save.