It is not big, or clever (but it is fucking funny). Sadly if you are under the age of 18 you may not be able to swear legally yet. Don't worry, Sell! Sell! is here to save the day. Here is a list of some lovely child-friendly curses that neither your mum or 'da pigz' will be able to tell you off about.

Happy 'swearing'.

  • Fudge nuggets!
  • Poo!
  • Banana Shenanigans!
  • Six and two is eight!
  • Merlin’s beard!
  • Merlin’s pants!
  • William Shatner!
  • Shut the Front Door! 
  • Mothersmucker!
  • Poo on a stick!
  • Two poo's on a stick! 
  • Three poo's on a very large stick!  
  • Son of a Biscuit!
  • Leapin’ Lizards!
  • What the Frog!
  • Go Lick a Duck!
  • Yuck Fou!
  • Shitake Mushrooms!
  • Ham Cannon!
  • Bald headed butler! 

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